2 for 2

- (clerk) That's one Select Cream Cheese Bagel and the iced tea.  Do you want anything else?

- (customer) No, that'll be all.

- (clerk) We're having a special on these drinks.  2 for $2.

- (customer) That'll be all, thanks.

- (clerk) But you're already paying $1.94 for one.

- (customer) I don't want it.

- (clerk) It's six cents more for the two of them.

- (customer) No, thank you.

- (clerk) Lady, don't be stupid.  

- (customer) Excuse me?

- (clerk) Soak the deal in.

- (customer) I don't care about the deal.  Who are you calling stupid?

- (clerk) It's a good deal.  You can give the other one away to a homeless man.

- (customer) I don't want to give it to some homeless man.

- (clerk) You can charge him six cents. 

- (customer) I can't believe this.  Where's your manager?  I want to speak to the manager.

- (clerk) Oh, he's just going to say the same thing.

- (manager) I'm the manager.  What's going on?

- (customer) This is how you run your store?  By insulting your customers?

- (manager) What happened?

- (clerk) She don't want two of these.

- (customer) He insulted me.

- (manager) Insulted her?  What?  Why?

- (clerk) She doesn't want two of the iced teas.

- (manager) So what?  Did you tell her about the deal?

- (clerk) Yea, but she don't wanna buy both.  

- (manager) It's 2 for 2.

- (clerk) She only wants the one.

- (customer) I only want to buy one, and he—

- (manager) Lady, don't be stupid; it's only six cents more.

- (customer) What?!  I can't believe this—How dare you.

- (manager) You can give it to a homeless man.

- (clerk) She doesn't want to give it to the homeless man.

- (manager) Why not?  It'll be refreshing.

- (clerk) Our products are always refreshing.

- (customer) What does that have to—I'm a customer!  You can't—

- (customer 2) What's a matter, hon?  Sounds like a square deal.

- (customer) What?  Who the hell are you?

- (customer 2) She must not want the extra calories. 

- (clerk) She's being hysterical.

- (customer 2) Lady, you don't have to drink them both at once.

- (customer) Back off, this is none of your concern.

- (clerk) She must have difficulty controlling her emotions. 

- (manager) Let's not make her flustered.

- (customer 2) How's about I pay you six cents for it, calm you down?

- (clerk) She's trying to sell it to him!

- (manager) Technically, we discourage that.  Take it outside.

- (customer) Fuck all you, I don't want any of this.  I'm reporting you!

- (customer 2) She's probably had too much caffeine.